The Obvious Solution
by TeamVampire
Summary: A series of humorous one shots about the obvious solutions to the problem that is Voldemort.
1. The Sword

**Deathly Hallows, page 109:**

"**'Interesting theory,' said Harry. 'Has anyone ever tried sticking a sword in Voldemort?'"**

**That, my dear Harry, is an _excellent _idea. This fic will be a continuance of page 587.**

**Disclaimer: Harry owns this thoroughly brilliant idea**

The Sword

Third Person POV

As the centaurs charged from the Forbidden Forest, Neville broke free of the curse that bound him. He used the chaos and confusion to ran straight up to Voldemort without being stopped. While running, he pulled Gryffindor's sword out of the Sorting hat and held it high.

Upon seeing his enraged attacker, wielding a sword no less, Voldemort's eyes widened in fear, annoyance and disappointment. Now Nagini would meet her end. Voldemort was incredibly fond of his snake companion, more so than he was of any person besides himself. Still, were it to be her or him, he would save his own life. Just as he was accepting his snake's impending demise, he was hit with a surprise. The boy was not swinging the sword at his beloved reptile, he was swinging it towards Voldemort himself.

Before he had time to react, Voldemort's head was separated from his body. Everyone stopped fighting to watch as it gracefully soared over the grounds, finally landing in the lake where it was consumed by the giant squid.

"No!" shrieked Bellatrix. "My lord!" Her cries were echoed by many Death Eaters, who now realized they had picked the wrong side.

Neville stood triumphantly on the edge of the lake, grinning into its depths.

"Well," said Harry, who had stopped pretending to be dead. "Turns out it _was _Neville in the prophecy. Don't I feel unwanted." Everyone stared at him for a moment before shoving him out of the way in their haste to celebrate their unlikely hero.

Hagrid nodded his head in approval of the day's events. "And everything turned out exactly right."

**Ahahah. See? It _was _Neville! Yes!**

**I like this one... Show your appreciation through reviews!**

**-TeamVampire**


	2. TimeTurners

**I decided to continue this fic as a series of one shots.**

**If we're being perfectly honest, the Ministry has made a _lot _of mistakes. The trivial use to which they put Time-Turners is probably the worst. Imagine if they'd used them to their full potential?**

**Disclaimer: I'm glad I don't own this, if I owned the Ministry, I'd be blamed for their blunders.**

Time-Turners

Third Person POV

Cornelius Fudge paced around his office. He was extremely irritated, to the point where he couldn't even sit still. The Triwizard Tournament had ended in disaster: a student was dead, a Death Eater had been impersonating a teacher, and now 'The Boy Who Lived' was telling everyone You-Know-Who was back. Fudge paced some more, trying to figure out a way to fix this mess.

He glanced at the clock, seeing that he only had ten minutes until he was due at a meeting. Then inspiration struck.

Fudge stopped his pacing and hurried to his desk, grabbing a quill and two of the interdepartmental memos. He quickly scrawled a note to the Department of Mysteries and another to the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. After sending them off, he sat down to wait.

Within three minutes, a couple of Aurors and an Unspeakable walked in.

"Excellent!" cried Fudge, holding his hand out for the Time-Turner. He examined it for a moment before passing it to the Aurors. "You know what to do."

The Aurors nodded and spun the Time-Turner.

After a bit of Apparition, they ended up outside an orphanage, just as Albus Dumbledore was about to enter it.

"Stop!" exclaimed Kingsley Shacklebolt, while Dawlish stood there mutely. "Dumbledore, you can't go in there. We're from 1995, and in our time Tom Riddle is the darkest wizard in existence. We have to apprehend him."

Dumbledore stared at them shrewdly for a moment, then nodded.

The two Aurors knocked on the orphanage door, and quickly stupefied the matron who opened it. They ran up the stairs, swiftly finding Tom Riddle's room. Before he could even ask what the hell they thought they were doing, they had stunned and grabbed him.

Once outside, they Apparated back to the old ministry and used the Time-Turner to return to 1995. They made it to the minister's office shortly before he was due to leave.

Despite having not committed any crimes yet, Tom Riddle was taken into custody and spent the rest of his life (which turned out to be very short) in a cell in Azkaban. James and Lily Potter were never murdered, and Harry lived out an uneventful life.

**Well, there goes the book series. Ahaha.**

**-TeamVampire**


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